GPS is for amateurs: Revision
by DarkestVampire
Summary: Now with softcore sex at the end, as per request. Bloodedge x Caelica.


**A/N: Thank you for your reviews, folks. So, here´s a "revision" of the GPS fanfic, this time with softcore hentai at the end. Why softcore? Well, its a fanfic meant for entertainment. Hardcore would distract from the jokes, and i wrote plenty of fapping material in the past.**

**This revision happened just hours after the first two reviews, i had nothing better to do and so i just wrote what came to mind. Don´t worry though, i´m already planning to finish the M chapter of Still Alive, and after that, Deep down death valley. **

**For serious.**

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><p>„I.. i think we`re lost, Ragna."<p>

„You gotta be jokeing. Thats the third time today."

Ragna`s left hand hit his forehead with more force than he intended to. He knew that Caelica`s sense of direction was legendary bad, but this was getting ridiculous.

„Maybe i should have the map next time, shortie. Just saying." Slowly, his hand sank down again and he looked at the brown haired girl beside him who just became teary eyed.

„I`m sorry.. I didn`t think the compass-thing on it was the top side."

„Compass thing..? Wait, what...?" Slowly, he pulled the map out of the pocket of his companion, then took a look at it. A compass was printed on the upper left corner, pointing north, to show in what direction the map was depicted.

You`re kidding, he thought. She didn´t know what thats for..?

Caelica sniffed loudly, which detailed his train of thought and caused him to look down at her again, before he patted her head and tried to comfort her with a smile. „Oh, forget about it. We´ll find our way soon enough. Its not like we`re being expected somewhere or anything..."

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><p>„Isn`t Bloodedge supposed to be here already?" Nine asked, crossing her legs whilest rubbing her temple. She was getting tired of waiting and the treestump she was sitting on wasn´t planning on getting any more comfortable than it already was.<p>

„I reckon Caelica insisted on handleing the map again.." Jubei said, sighing a bit. „If that´s so, he won´t be here until tomorrow. So... i reckon we could just set up the camp." Looking over to his fianceè, he was hopeing for a prositive response, seeing how she enjoyed his enthusiasm and near limitless strength and stamina... but she just had a glare comeing back to him, before grinning a triumphant smile.

„Then find some wood and cook us dinner, Kitty."

Hakumen`s many eyes watched in silent pity for the one-eyed-lotus as he took off to find wood, then he turned around and sighed. „You´ve gotten pussy whipped, Grimalkin."

Terumi smirked at him, who was still waiting for Trinity to return to the group. „Haven´t we all."

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><p>Back in the woods, Ragna was studiying the map, trying to figure out where they were. It wasn`t easy, seeing how they were off any designated paths, but by now he was used to situations like this.<p>

„Uh.. we went straight forward for a while, after turning at some signpost.. then... i assume we`re... here... sorta." He stratched his head, failing miserably at his attempt of a redirection. „Aw hell. Where did you get this map anyways?"

„Terumi gave it to me before we left." Caelica smiled at him, as innocent and naive as always. He sighed deeply, putting the map in HIS pocket this time.

„Its no use anyways. Twenty minutes from now dusk is going to end this trip early. There´s no way we could ever navigate through a forest dureing a winter night." Ragna shrugged, looking around for some place to stay at. „So, i suppose we`ll stay here for the night."

Caelica just nodded, being uncharacteristicly quiet. She followed him to a small clearing, which was still covered by branches and a lot of brown leaves, but was wide enough for a camping place. Quicker than one could see the one armed man put up a campfire and lit it with a match, then went looking for some bigger twigs to build a tent.. when he noticed the lack of mindless chatter, girly talk or complaints about Nine. „What is it?"

„Hm..?" Caelica looked up at him, folding her hands behind her back.

„Something`s wrong with you. You never shut up for five minutes at a time." Ragna said bluntly, putting his working arm on her shoulder. „Is it because of something i said?"

„No..."

„Then what is it?" He tried not to sound pushy, seeing how he would never get it out of her if he was. Still, he wasn`t a man of patience.

„Its just.. ugh. I feel so useless all the time. All i can do is cast some low level magic, thats it. I can`t read maps, i suck at cooking, i fail at being a pathfinder and i can´t even make any good jokes to save my life." Caelica said, looking down. „I`m just hindering you at becomeing a hero."

„Bullshit." Ragna replied, patting her hair again. „Its because of you that i´m becomeing a hero. If you wouldn´t have patched me up back then i wouldn´t be here."

„Your wounds weren`t that serious." She replied, still pouting.

„Some of them were. I just didn´t feel them." He replied, more quietly. „I can barely remember who i am, but this much i know.. i`ve been alone for what feels like an enternity. You don´t need to be like your sister... you´re going to be some day. Right now, i like you as you are right now."

Ragna wasn´t a man of words, and one could tell by this speech he came up with on the top of his head, but it worked somewhat. Caelica looked up at him and smiled weakly, then took his arm off her head and held it for a moment... before she was prepareing to dash into the woods.

„Alright! I`ll help gathering the twigs!"

„Oh no you won`t! You´ll get lost after five minutes!"

Finally, later that night, the two sat before the fire, looking at the danceing flames before them comsumeing the dry wood. This time, the silence wasn`t as awkward as it had been before. There wasn`t anything wrong with it. Caelica was content with the situation and didn´t feel like adding anything to ruin the mood. She just sat there, smiled and after a while, she leaned against her companion.

„Huh?" Ragna seemed to wake up from a nap, although he had been awake the whole time. It was getting late, yes, but he could never sleep with Caelica nearby.

„I was just wondering.. what are you going to do when all this is over..?" She asked him, watching the fire.

„I don´t know.. I think many of us don´t know what to do by that point." Ragna replied, thinking out loud. „Well, Jubei maybe. He already told me he`s going to marry your sister."

„Cute." She giggled, imagineing Nine and Jubei after the wedding, haveing little kittens that looked like Nine. „I don`t think he knows what he´s in for, though."

„No, he doesn´t. He`s delusional as all hell." Ragna´s comment wasn`t that friendly, although Jubei would`ve laughed at it. „I think he´s a glutton for punishment if he hangs out with her for longer."

„Well, i know what i`m going to do." Caelica said, smileing brightly before cuddleing closer onto him."

„Whats that?" he asked, although he slightly regretted doing so.

„I`m going to stay with you, what else?" She smirked, then put her head on his shoulder, cuddleing even closer. „You look like you need a helping hand... and not in the literal way."

Ragna rolled his eyes lightly at this pun, but still put his arm around her. „So you´re going to be my nurse, helping me go shopping and stuff like that...?"

„Yeah, and i`ll bring you your tea three times a day." She nudged him in the side with her fist, closeing her eyes whilest resting on his shoulder. „Ragna.. what would you say if i would become a little like my big sis...?"

„I guess i`d be just wondering how you gathered enough experience points to level up that high." he joked, playing with her hair. „Why?"

„Because i just felt like bragging to her that human men are better than cats."

She smiled, kissing him on the cheek before pulling away from him, starting to take off her shirt.

Ragna, „The Bloodedge" blinked with his one eye, then sighed silently. This was going to be a VERY long night.

He opened his eyes again after hearing a disappointed little whimper.

Caelica`s shirt had gotten stuck on her neck, seeing how her cape was still on and linked to the shirt, tightly wrapped around her neck and refuseing to get off. Ragna, with another, more quiet sigh, approached her and undid the button which held the cape in place, releaseing the girl so that she would cease to look like an umbrella which someone folded up in a storm.

Caelica quickly threw the shirt away and gasped for air, holding her neck like the cape had been trying to strangle her. „Who designed that..?"

„If you want some advice, stop wearing clothes that try to kill you." Ragna jokeingly added, patting her on the head.

„Thanks, Jackass." Caelica said, narrowing her eyes before kissing his lips rather abruptly.

Ragna was caught off guard by this sudden move, but he didn`t resist the silky soft sensation, wrapping his arm around her waist after catching his breath.

Even though he was still wearing a glove, the feeling of her back was a completely different one than before. The warm, smooth skin left him desireing to touch more of her, something he would probably regret.

He was still feeling a little warm from the time Caelica told her sister she was dateing him... even though at that point, it had been nothing but a joke. Nine still threw a fireball at him regardless of it.

The quiet noises comeing from Caelica`s mouth were a reaction to his hand stokeing her back. He didn`t quite know why, but they made him smile, even the more so as she pulled back from him to look him in the eyes.

„I love you." She simply said, as if it was the most normal thing to say dureing a conversation.

„You´re going to regret it eventually." he replied to her, and it was true. Ragna didn´t know what was going to happen in the future, but something told him whatever it was, he wasn´t going to make it.

„I don´t care. I want to be with you until the very end." Caelica janked down the leather jacket Bloodedge wore, which was an easy task seeing how it only hung on one arm, before cuddleing against his chest, running her hands over his thin black shirt. It was made of a tough kevlar like fabric, but thin and rather skintight, letting her feel the buldges and abs of his muscles underneath, required to wield a huge weapon like the Blood Scythe.

„Wierd... can`t seem to find any scars.." Caelica said, mostly to herself, whilest continueing to feel him up. Ragna rolled his eyes in response.

„You aren´t going to find any... except for maybe a nick or two. A protestic arm is enough for me."

„But its not as sexy as some scars would be." She looked up at him with a sneaky grin, tugging on his shirt whilest trying to figure out how to open it.

„After seeing what Mitsuyoshi`s eye looked like, i don´t think i want any, either." He shuddered a little, remembering Jubei´s incident with the remains of the Beast. Yet, he was quickly pulled off that thought from Caelica opening his shirt and continueing to run her hands over his body, obviously enjoying herself. He was suprised at how bold she could be as he felt a hot, wet sensation around his belly... a look downwards confirmed it was her tongue, trailing the lines of his abs while her hands ran to his back, getting him out of the shirt that still clung to his body.

„You aren´t going to tell Nine THAT, are you..?" He asked, raiseing an eyebrow. It would probably hurt him a LOT if she did.

„I don´t know if i´ll tell her at all. She might end up murdering you." Caelica replied, looking back up at him with a worried and terrified face. It was the kind of face that made him laugh, because it was obvious she wasn´t all that serious about it.

His shirt fell to the ground, and Caelica pressed herself closer to his body, kissing his neck and stokeing his back. Ragna returned the favor, playing with the clip of her bra every once in a while... in the feeling of thier bodies touching one another, any fabric was distracting, and so it was discarded quickly enough.

It was getting cold, the sun had decended behind the mountains and the darkness rose, but the two barely noticed as thier bodies slowly grew warmer, thier kisses becomeing more intense by the minute. The quiet moans of Caelica could barely be heard while thier tongues lashed at one another, thier hands running across any exposed skin they could find.

Now that they had gone halfway, his pants and her skirt practically undid themselves, falling to the ground before anyone could feel they would go. Like her sister, Caelica had a favor for black thongs.. Ragna`s mind was confronted with the thought that she planned it all along, getting lost in the woods at dusk, setting up a camp with nobody around, then makeing love with him... but that would`ve been far too complex and devious for this simple, innocent girl.

Well, not as innocent as she gave off, but still... he still thought of her as pure, even as he felt her hand stokeing his member.

Like a drug trip, the actions were barely reconizeable anymore. They did what followed natural, interacting instinctively, doing what was right for them... in fact, Ragna´s mind only just returned to reality as he felt himself enter her, feeling her tense up for a brief moment of displeasure before moveing along with him..

Her smooth, supple body grinded against his, the sweat on thier skin decreaseing the friction.. he could feel the quick breaths she took, but was unable to focus enough to feel his own

Her soft breasts, sleek figure and this look of extasy on her beautiful face gave him an impression of heaven, and for this very moment he didn´t care if he was going to die or not.

Slowly, the tension increased and he could feel Caelica pressing against him, her nails digging into his flesh as she cried out, before Ragna himself felt his focus of reality implode. Waves of pleasure went through the two, and for this brief moment, the entire world was meaningless to either of them. Right now, the only thing that mattered was thier love for each other...

Hours later, the sun finally rose and introduced the start of the next day, but it took a while before a very tired Ragna and a rather refreshed Caelica came out of thier tent and started to get ready for travelling.

„Seriously, thats the last time i´m sleeping in a makeshift bed with you.." Ragna groaned, rubbing his sore back. Caelica had pushed him off the hay and the moss that thier bed consisted of dureing her nap, leaveing him on the rather hard earth beneath it.

„Oh come on. We`re bound to sleep in a hotel next time... besides, don´t complain, young man, you had quite a treat last night." Caelica replied, giggleing as she was trying to imitate her mother.

„Young man? I don´t remember my age but i´m pretty sure i`m older than you are, girl." He said, stareing at her with a rather annoyed look. „What are you, like, seventeen?"

„Excuse me...?" Caelica was just about to answer when she was interrupted by a blonde young witch with large glasses.

„Wha... Trinity..? Did Konoe send you after us already?" She asked, blinking with confusion.

„No... no, not at all, i just... just got lost in the woods, and then i met you here.."

Ragna raised an eyebrow, then took Trinity`s map out of her pocket, compareing it to thiers.

It was identical.

„Damn you, Terumi." He grumbled.

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><p>End.<p> 


End file.
